Are Characters Kings or Pawns?

By Christine Thackeray

So, my twenty-three year old son convinced me that I had to read the wheel of time series. I have to admit I've been intrigued ever since Brandon Sanderson was contracted to finish the epic fantasy saga, and I at last gave in. At the expense of my laundry room and kitchen I've spent the last four days reading constantly. The story has been engaging and Jordan's vocabulary is thrilling, but I've had a few character issues that make me leary.

"The Eye of the World" begins with three rural boys driven from their homes on a great adventure. Each of the boys has unique interests and personalities. All three are led by a mysterious woman and her champion guardian. The story clips along until they split up and return together. For a time, when they reconnect in smaller groups, some of their motivations seem forced in order to continue the conflict. You'd think these childhood friends would be ecstatic to see each other, but they have petty issues, blown out of proportion. The resolve is clever, but my question continues- how important is it to have characters be true to their personality types? More than once I've been plotting a story and knew what I wanted my character to do but couldn't make it work realistically. With Robert Jordan he just does it and throws in enough magic dreams and Trolloc attacks that you totally forget you were frustrated with motivations.

When a character is not genuine, I get frustrated with the project and often stop reading. Like the horror movies where the babysitter hears a sound upstairs and goes into the attic to be killed. Yeah, right. Call 911, dummy. On the other hand, if the conflict isn't stepping up, like Heather said, I also lose interest. In the end, I suppose it is a matter of weighing cost and benefit. You can stretch a character to the bounds of believability if it's exciting enough, right??? As authors what do you think? As readers does it even bother you?

Overcoming Writer's Block

By Christine Thackeray

The beginning of this week I had arranged my schedule to spend hours writing. I'm working on a screenplay, spoke to a co-author about changes and was determined to get through them for our conference call on Friday. Unfortunately, everytime I sat down, I'd stare at the page and couldn't make it work. Then I'd do something else, hoping the answer would just "come", but NOTHING!

I remember a few years ago Heather Moore told me that most writer's block is a result of unclear characters or motivation. That was exactly the problem in my case but I couldn't make it work. The person I'm working with wanted to change the action in the first scene but by doing it, it changed the main character. The old main character would never have done such a thing. I remembered reading Dwight Swain who believed that you could recreate characters with quirks that could do what you wanted them to but I couldn't bend any personality to be consistent with the two events.

On Thursday afternoon, so frustrated I could pull my HAIR OUT, I took my husband out to lunch and forced him to listen to my dilemna. He told me to just change the character. Make her the new girl and change the dialogue so it's her. Oh. Duh. The minute I accepted the new main character, everything fell in place. Dailogue started coming to my mind and it was genuine. Ta-da. Block over.

I got the first five scenes done and mailed them off just before my meeting but the meeting was cancelled. We'll meet next Friday instead, only this time I hope to have the rewrite complete. That is hope because this week I may not have writer's block but with something going on everyday next week, do I have the time???

Manuscript Makeover

Makeovers are awesome, especially on people, cars, rooms (before decorating and after). Manuscripts are no exception. Some people may refer to this as editing (which can sound a bit painful and boring) but I like to call it a manuscript makeover. To make my point, I would like to share with you some before and after shots of something I wrote a long time ago. It's an excerpt from my very first--and never published--novel.

Before:

That night, Mathew came up behind Liza in the garden, and took a seat next to her. They began to read together, but Liza was extra quiet as they read.

“What is wrong, Liza, you seem so quiet tonight?” Mathew asked.

“Nothing, I am just thinking about things.” Liza answered.

Mathew smiled and said, “Tell me what you are thinking Liza, we are friends, remember?”

“I am afraid you will not like what I am thinking about.” Liza said coolly.

Mathew looked at her in surprise. He had never seen Liza so distant and cool before. Something was definitely bothering her. He thought for a moment then asked, “Liza, we are friends. You give me advice, and I can give you advice. Tell me what is bothering you and perhaps I can help.”

Liza could feel her emotions welling up inside her. Mathew was making a horrible mistake, and she couldn't let him do it. She was afraid he would never forgive her for the things she might say. After Mathew asked her again what was wrong, Liza let all her feelings and emotions come out. “Mathew, you are making a big mistake. Don’t marry Miss Rachel. She doesn’t love you! But I do.”

In the time since I wrote this manuscript, I have read and studied and learned a lot about writing and editing. (One great source is "Self-Editing for Fiction Writers" by Rennie Browne and Dave King.) The things I have learned have helped me become a better writer and manuscript makeover-er, knowing how to utilize characterization, show vs. tell, strong dialogue, beats, tags, plot development, and everything else that goes into making a good book.

Now here's a view of this same section of manuscript with my suggestions on how to make it better and more engaging:

That night, Mathew came up behind Liza in the garden,(no comma) and took a seat next to her. They began to read together, but Liza was extra quiet as they read. (Okay, how are they reading outside in a garden at night? I don’t think the moon was that bright. Maybe change to something else. Also, what’s the setting like? More detail.)

“What is wrong, Liza, you seem so quiet tonight?” Mathew asked. (No need for these two characters to call each other by name all the time.)

“Nothing, I am just thinking about things.” Liza answered. (Could use a beat instead of tag.)

Mathew smiled and said, “Tell me what you are thinking Liza, we are friends, remember?” (More natural dialogue.)

“I am afraid you will not like what I am thinking about.” Liza said coolly. (Okay,it's becoming apparent that all the dialogue going on needs to be more natural, and here’s a good place to really bring to life.)

Mathew looked at her in surprise. He had never seen Liza so distant and cool before. Something was definitely bothering her. (Add some show vs. tell.) He thought for a moment then asked, “Liza, we are friends. You give me advice, and I can give you advice. Tell me what is bothering you and perhaps I can help.” (Clean up dialogue.)

Liza could feel her emotions welling up inside her. Mathew was making a horrible mistake, and she couldn’t let him do it. She was afraid he would never forgive her for the things she might say. After Mathew asked her again what was wrong, Liza let all her feelings and emotions come out. “Mathew, you are making a big mistake. Don’t marry Miss Rachel. She doesn’t love you! But I do.” (Lots of narration here, could be shown better with action or dialogue.)

(Overall, punctuation could be cleaned up, I could use more show vs. tell, more emotion, more beats instead of tags, better dialogue, and way less usage of the name Liza.)

Now, we can take these suggestions, plug them into the manuscript, and see where that takes us. (Keep in mind this was a quick revision. It still isn't there yet, but good enough to illustrate.)

After:

The stone bench in the garden seemed extra hard and cool tonight. Had it always felt that way, or were Liza's thoughts influencing her surroundings as well as her emotions?

“Can I have a seat?” It was Mathew, standing behind her, so close she could almost feel him.

She slid over, pulling her dress alongside so it wouldn’t snag on something, but said nothing. Her dampened neckline was evidence enough of the warm night, so making an effort to count the chirps of the crickets hidden in the surrounding hedges wasn’t necessary. Still she counted, though. Anything to keep her mind off her thoughts.

Mathew pulled a leaf off a nearby hedge and twirled it between his fingers. “You uh, seem a little quiet tonight. Is something wrong?”

“I’m just thinking.”

“What about? You can tell me.”

She pushed the breath she had been holding through her teeth. “I don’t think you would like it.”

Mathew dropped the leaf to the ground and looked at her with widened eyes. “From the look on your face, I would almost mistake you for a hardened criminal.”

The corners of her mouth twitched somewhat like a grin, though she still felt more like scowling.

“Come on,” he said. “You can tell me. Maybe I can help you.”

Emotions welled and swirled inside her, surprising her with their intensity. How could this man make such an obvious, horrible mistake? And he couldn’t even see it! “Don’t marry Miss Rachel, she doesn’t love you!” Liza shifted back, taking in the shocked expression of his face that matched the feeling inside herself, then, letting her voice and emotions soften, said, “But I do.”

Incorporating these different techniques and suggestions into the manuscript, so that it can be it's best, will hopefully not only engage your readers and keep them turning the pages, but also catch the eye of a potential publisher. :)

Adding more than the basic details

By Heather Justesen

Lately I've been trying to dig through another edit before submitting a new book to my publisher. I've also been up to my elbows in sweet holiday confections--both making ones to give away and ones coming in from friends and neighbors. That means I've been spending a lot of quality time with my audio books. I don't watch a lot of TV, but I love to listen to a book while I travel or while I'm working in the kitchen, which allows me to 'read' other genres and squeeze in time to study the way other writers string words together.

I've never been a very descriptive writer--or at least I wasn't when I started out. I've spent a lot of time reviewing passages in my books, working in more description that enriches the scene, rather than drags it down so I'm always eager to see how other writers manage it. What kinds of detail does the author add to add life and background, to make the people more real? How do they weave certain things through the series of books to give it more realism and to give out clues to readers about what is going on?

I also like to study the way the personalities are crafted. As I've been listening along, there are scenes in my current book when I can tell who is speaking just from the conversational comments before speech tags are added--even when there are four or five sisters in the scene. Who they are just shines out and they are all so distinct.

I'm striving to add more of those kinds of details, while trimming back on unnecessary clutter as I work through this edit. And I'm looking forward to next week when I'll have a couple of uninterrupted days to really dig into this draft. If I can translate my scene, my characters to paper so clearly that you can hear the fire crackling and smell the sweetness of frosting on the cookies, I'll have succeeded.

What Moves Your Words?

I had the experience to learn a little about persuasive writing for advertising, press releases, websites, and such. The first important thing listed was personality, and the second, the ability to keep the reader interested in the topic so they will continue reading.

This was interesting to me, because, as someone who loves to write fiction, I have found that the top two ingredients that make a good novel are the same two things; characterization and a solid plot, by using the right words at the right time to keep the reader turning those pages.

Now, there are people who prefer plot driven books, and there are others who prefer character driven books. My personal preference is the character driven books, but that's not to say that you can have a weak plot and get away with it. They are both essential. But I feel so strongly about characterization, that I would say that it helps to move the plot along and creates an interest with the readers, a connection, so that they will keep reading.

But there are other important ingredients needed to help create characterization and move the plot forward. Two of them are:
1. Show vs. Tell
2. Dialogue

Here is an example of how using show vs. tell and dialogue can add to your writing, whether fiction or non-fiction, by helping to develop character or personality. But first, I'll relate a story using tell. (This is a true story, by the way, so I suppose you could call it non-fiction.)

The other night, while I was typing, my six-year-old asked me what nuttins were. I had no idea, but it turned out that he got the word from "I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas." I laughed to myself, cleared up the misunderstanding, and we gave each other a hug. He is so cute and funny.

Now, here is the same story showing how it happened, not merely telling that it did, along with dialogue to make the scene come alive, hopefully developing a bit of character:

I was sitting in front of my computer, working on my latest project. At least I was attempting to work. It was difficult with more interruptions than I would like.

There was a tap at my shoulder from my little boy. "Mom, what are nuttins?" Another interruption, but those eyes of his were so wide, expecting me to be wise enough to answer his question, that I really wanted to answer him.

"Nuttins? I have no idea." Maybe they were some kind of nutty muffin recipe. I would have to try it.

"But it's in a song." He started singing with that serious expression he gets on his face when he's concentrating. "I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas. Mommy and Daddy, are...oh, I forgot the word. Is it angry or mad?"

At this point, I was smiling. My work forgotten.

"Oh, it's mad," he said.

"The kid in the song is getting nothing for Christmas because he's been bad. But you are good, so you don't have to worry about that."

A grin lit up his face, and he threw his arms around my neck, squeezing me tight. I returned his squeeze with a kiss on his cheek. Merry Christmas, my little boy.

Whether you write fiction or non-fiction, I feel that adding a little personality to your words will keep the reader interested and they will want to keep reading. And if you have made it to these last words in my post, I'm hoping it was because you found it interesting enough to keep reading.

Merry Christmas!

Applying Emotions to Our Characters

by Rebecca Talley

I took my daughter to the DMV to take her driving test yesterday. Upon our arrival, the lady at the counter snapped, "Do you realize you are 20 minutes late?"

We both answered, "Yep." (My son was recently married and this last weekend we had the open house as well as a house full of guests. I'm a little exhausted and we live 30 minutes from town).

She then proceeded to tell us that my daughter would have to wait because she was late and the other appointment had shown up early and they were going to take him first to do his test. This was fine since we were late, but her 'tude was rather annoying and, truthfully, every time I go to the DMV, I not only wait forever, but deal with crabby women. I've come to the conclusion that in order to work at the DMV you must be crabby (as well as make snide remarks) as that is part of the job description.

As I sat there waiting and waiting and waiting, I realized what a golden opportunity I had to not only glean personality characteristics from this woman to use in my writing, but to also analyze how it made me feel. Sometimes, I'm so caught up in what's going on, I fail to realize how a situation can help me in my writing endeavors. The more observant we are, the better our stories will be. And the more we can pinpoint and understand our own feelings and apply them to our characters, the more realistic those characters will be to our readers.

Eliciting emotion from our readers comes from experiencing emotions ourselves and then capturing them on the page--perhaps that is why writers tend to be so passionate. No experience in life is wasted if we can then use it in our writing. Did someone hurt your feelings? Make you mad? Insult you? Accuse you? Compliment you? Ask you for help? Tell you a secret? In each of those situations, how did it make you feel?

When we can apply our feelings to our characters, we can make them more complex and more realistic. Flat characters don't experience emotion and they don't jump off the page. Characters who experience genuine emotions throughout the pages of a book grab readers and make readers think about them long after they turn the last page.

So, the next time you're sitting at the DMV observing cranky employees, defending your religious and/or political beliefs to a neighbor, or dealing with a rude customer service representative on the phone, pay attention to not only the details of what's happening, but especially how it makes you feel and then apply those feelings to your characters to make them come alive on the page.

Character

I know I usually write about humor, but this time I just had to blog about an author who I admire named Georgette Heyer. She lived and wrote from the early 1900's to the 1970's and her specialty was regency romances. I love her books because they are clean and beautifully written, most especially the vivid characterization of her main characters. Her characters are so full of life they just pop out of the pages at you. You literally fall in love with them. I have been trying to study her works to find out why this is, and I think that I have discovered several reasons.

1. They are fallible- Her characters have faults and plenty of them. It is so refreshing to read about 'real' people, especially as they struggle in a time when it wasn't okay to be 'real'.

2. The characters keep us guessing- The characters in her books are always doing something wierd for some reason that you never find out until the end.

3. They grow- Georgette is an expert at showing how a character grows and changes from the beginning to the end of the story.

4. Her character's dialogue is witty and fun and full of Characterization- Some of the dialogue in her books are riotous in their humor and Characterization, for example in her novel "Frederica" a young child who's about to live with a Marquis who has fallen in love with his sister asks him, "Would it be all right if you built me a workshop if I promised not to blow anything up...at least very much?"

4. She shows, rather than tells- When you read this passage from one of her books called, Devil's Cub you will see what I mean:

"The man in the coach drew his right hand out of his pocket at last. There was an elegant silver-mounted pistol in it, still smoking. The gentleman threw it on to the seat beside him, and crushed the charred and smouldering portion of his greatcoat between very long white fingers."

You can just feel from this passage how smooth, cold, and emotionless this man is. And the best part is we get to read about how he grows from this cold emotoinless state and how he got there. Georgette is wonderful at not letting out these details too early and keeping us in suspense.

If you want to improve your characters and make them more vivid I highly suggest reading a few of Georgette Heyer's novels. I have found that by studying a master's work, I gain many insights that make my writing better.